I just got back to Los Angeles from New Orleans on Monday night. I cannot believe I escaped the tornado by less than 24 hours! My boyfriend and our friends didn’t leave until this afternoon, but they have thankfully all made it back home safe and sound.
New Orleans was amazing. I wore this 2-way dress from ASOS (it’s sold out; scroll down for alternatives!), choosing the plunging neckline paired with a red bralette and stacked necklaces. To give the look a little grunge, I applied the Stila Stay All Day Liquid Lipstick in Fiery for a deep, mahogany red lip color. I was sweating my butt off in this, to be honest. The weather in NOLA was super unpredictable! I was ready for 4 days in low to mid-70s, and it suddenly became humid out of nowhere during my last couple of days there. I will be posting a travel log in a couple of days on my favorite spots I visited in New Orleans, so be on the lookout for that!
How to Handle Frenemies
We all have people in our lives that have talked bad about us at some point in time and continues to be your friend. These people are what I like to call “frenemies”. I can’t lie and say I’ve never spoken badly about someone, but I was younger, immature, and probably had some insecurities I needed to deal with. However, I always wonder why people talk about others but continue to be their friend. And how do you deal with knowing you have frenemies but are not ready to cut them out of your life?
1. Make Sure They are Not What They Seem
Frenemies are easy to differentiate. I have a simple rule in friendship and that is: if someone talks badly about someone else to you, they are also talking to someone else about you. Be aware of how your friends act. If they are constantly talking about other people in a hateful or jealous manner and gossip is their main conversation topic, I wouldn’t count you out of that victim pool. If you are not okay with that, cut those people out. If you aren’t sure of what to do, there are ways to handle it.
2. Keep Your Distance
There are some reasons why you can’t cut a frenemy out of your life. They may have good qualities about them, such as they make you laugh or they are a part of some networking that benefits your career. Whichever the case, keeping your distance is the best way to go. You engage with that person in small doses or not at all and go about living your life making other friends who don’t talk smack about you. My trip to New Orleans was surrounded by awesome women and it also made me thankful for my girlfriends back home who have been amazing to me all of these years. Keep that perspective and spend more time with supportive friends.
3. Know Who You Are
It’s shitty to find out that you are being talked about. I found out about a month ago that someone I thought I was on great terms with had been talking bad about me. We were never that close, but we’ve always gotten along and I couldn’t for the life of me figure out what she could possibly say that was negative. I’ll be honest and admit it bothered me for a few days, but then I snapped myself out of it. I know who I am and whatever is said doesn’t reflect upon me, it reflects upon their insecurity.
How do you deal with negativity??